Previous project phases:
Share a v1 draft of your work product 👇
Post a link or embed a file of your v1 work product below. You will share this early draft with your housemates at checkpoint to get their feedback.
Write down your feedback 👇
Write down bullet points of 2 pieces of feedback you received on your v1 project from your housemates or someone else you shared your draft with (this could be an expert, mentor, family member, etc).
- (discussed summary with parents) A bit too short/not comprehensive
- Lacking definition of contact dermatitis
What is your plan to make these changes?
How will you iterate your v1 draft before sharing your final project with your audience?
- Add paragraphs about potential dangers to the skin
- Research contact dermatitis and define in-essay
Share your final work product below:
Show us pictures, presentations, or anything else you made for this project!
Show evidence that you shared your work product with your intended audience 👇
Embed a screenshot below that shows where you shared your work product.
This checkpoint is being reviewed by Jasmine
📚 Content Feedback:
- After your parents’ feedback, you made sure your writing was more comprehensive in your second pass. From what I can tell, your research seems pretty thorough.
- I appreciated how you structured your individual paragraphs. The transition sentence at the end of the first paragraph where you mentioned epidermis consists of keratinocytes, melanocytes, and Langerhans cells, and was helpful in leading into the next 3 paragraphs.
- In the future, maybe you could help the reader through your train of thought by having headings above each section, or visuals of the terms you're explaining
- I’m curious about how you’ll apply this knowledge to your original idea about creating an organic skincare formula, and if there was anything in your research that surprised you?
- Overall your writing displays a strong level of knowledge and biological understanding of skin, its layers, and what factors affect it
- I think your writing could benefit from an informative essay structure
- In future essays, be sure to Include a page where you list your sources
- It also strengthens your writing to include in text citations
☑️ Action Items:
- Be sure to include the skills you’re leveling up and your justification for them
- Check out the informative writing and async level up in Canvas